Let your heart break into a million pieces today. Allow yourself to cry today. Be vulnerable today. Feel gratitude today for the smallest and most ‘insignificant’ things. A taste. A glance. A breath. On this day of all days - your first day, and your last day.
Sometimes you’re 23 and standing in the kitchen of your house making breakfast and brewing coffee and listening to music that for some reason is really getting to your heart. You’re just standing there thinking about going to work and picking up your dry cleaning. And also more exciting things like books you’re reading and trips you plan on taking and relationships that are springing into existence. Or fading from your memory, which is far less exciting. And suddenly you just don’t feel at home in your skin or in your house and you just want home but “Mom’s” probably wouldn’t feel like home anymore either. There used to be the comfort of a number in your phone and ears that listened everyday and arms that were never for anyone else. But just to calm you down when you started feeling trapped in a five-minute period where nostalgia is too much and thoughts of this person you are feel foreign. When you realize that you’ll never be this young again but this is the first time you’ve ever been this old. When you can’t remember how you got from sixteen to here and all the same feel like sixteen is just as much of a stranger to you now. The song is over. The coffee’s done. You’re going to breathe in and out. You’re going to be fine in about five minutes.
you spent the previous night staying up till 3 with your best friend watching Wreck It Ralph eating crackers and cookies. Win. Also because COFEE.
So it’s been the 4th day of the challenge so far. There have been some wins and some losses. So here is my account of the last few days:
I went to Sonic for lunch. I definitely am realizing how much I’m gonna have to work on NOT doing that anymore (or as much). Regardless, it was lunch with a friend that amounted to a total of $4.95. I’m going to revert back to cooking for myself in bulk so I can have a few days of reheating lunch to feed myself. When saving money is a priority, sometimes you have to sacrifice some time along with it. Lesson currently being learned. I also spent $20 in putting gas in my car since it seems to be awfully thirsty.
Total Money Left: (drumroll please) $206 dollars.
Thursday AND Friday
Let me tell you, knowing you have to be accountable for the money spent makes you do a double take before you hand those bills over to the cashier. I knew pastries and coffee were a weakness for me so I had a bit of free time on my hands on thursday and baked!
I made pumpkin bread and chocolate chip scones, all from ingredients I already had at home! I brought one to my coffee shop and brought bagged tea that the same coffee shop put in a cup of (free) hot water. I sometimes do feel bad about mooching off of coffee shops but I go in enough times during the week *cough*every day*cough* that every now and then I can not buy something.
So for these two days……I SPENT NO MONEY! meaning….
Money Left: $206!
and the challenge continues.
Okay. Largely due to my coming graduation from college and the fact that I’ve been paying rent now for over a year, understandably, money has been on my mind. Money, and the lack of money. So it’s March 5th and here is my next personal challenge:
For the remainder of this month of March, I’m going to attempt to spend the least amount of money as possible. I want to create a habit of not thinking I’m NEEDING what I actually just am WANTING. Let’s be honest, most of the time I get fast food is because I’m just lazy and don’t want to cook. Well, not this month. I am T-minus 2 months until I graduate and this is the month to experiment. Here’s how this will work:
Every month I have allocated myself $650 for my monthly expenses. I ALWAYS run out of money before the month is up. Always. I do ocassionally come into money that my parents or family will send me. But give or take this is the money I’m working with. I’m going to post daily what I spend on here as a form of accountability.
The goal? End the month with money left. Can I live on $650 dollars this month? Here’s goes.
Tuesday, March 5th, 2013
I paid my rent and bills, spent $6.50 at a thift store, and cannot remember how much I paid for lunch at Arby’s today (see! this is why I’m doing this. You can assume I didn’t save the receipt either…) I also bought coffee and a pastry at Pour Jons…I also got gas my poor little car desperately needed (that part was necessary), And a haircut I also had been waiting for this month’s money to come in on. So a couple necessary expenses but a lot of unnecessary ones.
Money Left: $251
This little excursion into financial wisdom has begun!
I do. Like right now, when I’m sitting outside my professor’s door unsuccessfully trying not to cry. Because it’s a monday, I can’t get my paper done, because of so much more, and right now I’m not tough, I’m crying.